Ok, this is a strange blog post I know, but hey- sometimes it happens – and this year – boy did it ever happen to me.  So I’m figuring that you may have had a similar bad start to the year – maybe not this year, but at least once in your life – and if you did – please share it with me and if there were any lessons learned.  And I tell you what –  the best 3 stories will get a special prize!  But – hey I may win my own prize.

But I figure if my first day was this bad in the New Year, then the rest of the year should be GREAT!  Just getting it all out in the beginning.

So here’s what happened…

December office was busy, trying to shut down for the holiday plans, the “holidays “(really we need another word here) were also at a fast pace as my family chose to split up the festivities this year, so it was 3 days of prep and 5 days of different cities and celebrating (not including new years).  But I love the holidays, giving presents and feeling all the warm vibes of the season, so I was tired but enjoyed it.  But I did feel I was trying to make everyone else happy and exhausted myself in the process. That’s sign #1.

But then I came down with a 2 week sinus affection that didn’t allow me to sleep, eat or breathe properly.  I had black eyes from this infection. And I am the person who doesn’t get colds even when I have sick people around me, so it was surprising.  Perhaps a sign to slow down.

During this time I also found out that a good friend of mine died and I attended the funeral and Shiva.  So that was a hard reminder that love and friendships are precious.  It was also a reminder that we’re all on a silent egg timer and we never know when the bell will ring for us.

A few days later I return to work and a business deal and relationship I am deeply involved in (and really enjoy) seems to have gone to hell in a hand basket (who made up this expression, it’s really good).  I am hoping this will end on a positive note, but the journey to get there is really horribly difficult, time costly and dragged me down emotionally for 3 days where I couldn’t even move – which is weird as I am typically the girl you call in any traumatic experience.  I am a rock and a strong guide in tough situations.  I was a crisis manager for pete-sake!  I can handle pressure.

But I must have been so sick, so exhausted and overwhelmed by the feeling of being let down, that it contributed to my emotional state.   In fact I almost missed New Years over it because I was so devastated by their actions.  Mostly because when they were really making big mistakes and I covered for them and was as forgiving as Mother Theresa.  Why don’t people appreciate or remember those things?  Do we have to be feared in business to get respect and appreciation?   I should be furious but I mostly feel disappointed.  I rationalize it thinking that even good people can do strange actions when they are emotionally or financially struggling, it helps people act from fear and lash out at others.

That same day (my first day back to work), my staff accidentally erased 3 of my main business websites.  Thank god for back-ups!!  This has created a few days of me trying not to panic, but it is slowly being resolved as we speak. But I couldn’t get mad because who can get upset at someone who is more upset at themselves, than I could ever be?  Mistakes can happen.

Then for some strange reason my outlook refused to open, so I had no way of looking at past, present or future emails.  Weird.  It later repaired itself.  It may have been a sign to walk away.

Did I mention that my grandmother is ill?

Seriously, I’m not sure you can top 8 years of work being wiped out in 1 day, a death of a friend, a possible end to a part of a business I enjoyed, computer failures and feeling like crap? – but hey you can try.  Be my guest.

So what do I take from all this????  Well you may have more enlightening answers (and if you do please send them my way).

Here was my thought process:

Ok, someone cursed me.

Ok, everyone but me is crazy.

Ok, I must suck at business.

Ok, I must be the crazy one and don’t see it.  Well, I am talking to myself here.

Jeez, I am dehydrated from crying.  Can someone get dehydrated from tears? 

Ok, maybe a possible (hopefully not) end to a partnership deal, my business being deleted is a signal for me to become a vet.  I love animals – but no, can’t operate on them.  Vet is out – plus I don’t look good in white, I need more color. 

Hmmm, Ok, I should go back to bed, and hide under the covers until I can smell tulips in March.  Hopefully my husband will remember to keep feeding our dog.  He probably won’t. Damn!  I have to get out of bed.

Ok, am I going to let this get me down???       Hell yes! 

……Ok, try again, am I going to let this get me down and quit?      Well, maybe I can look at the positives; maybe SOME people still love me.  Maybe I shouldn’t take this one weird week as the representative of my 8 years of doing good work on the planet and helping so many people find their way and reach for more.    Ok, feeling better.

Getting Proper Perspective Back
Why is it I pay more attention to negative actions of a few, than the many more positives?  I know why, because I try so hard to please everyone, and it just doesn’t work all the time.

Maybe the world has better things to do than single me out for a take-down, after all, I’m not one of the bad guys – just an imperfect woman trying to be perfect 24/7 and make the lives of others a better place.  Bound to make some errors, maybe I have.  Maybe I should forgive others and forgive myself.  Hmm, good start.  That feels better.

Next – look at the bright side:  Ok, I have my health back, which is so important.  My personal relationships are great right now.  My dog is super cute and definitely still loves me.

I have incredible circle of people in my group this year – really top notch and include some of my favorite people.  I am also looking forward to seeing my new MIT members change & grow and helping them along the way like a proud mum.

I may have lost 3 pounds from my cold, which makes up for the chocolate binge on the 3 days I was feeling sorry for myself and not getting off my sofa.  Ok, I’m on to caramels now – and I am currently accepting chocolate or caramel donations.

I am also reminded of an email my good friend, our fabulous MIT coach and circle member Nat said to me last year.  He said his computer froze, and at first he panicked – but then he sought to see the beauty and positive in his situation.  He realized that all he needed to do was do a “de-fragmentation” repair on his computer – this also mirrored his office.  So he took this spare time to clean up all the bits of paper and stuff cluttering up his office and felt a weight lift.  Both he and his computer got a clean-up that day.

So taking Nat’s advice (after all not only is he a rocking MIT Coach, but he is also a Buddhist monk and entrepreneur.  That’s a strong combination) I reflected …

… And thought- if my whole business disappeared (which it did temporarily) – would I be ok?   Yes, I can rebuild.  I would find a way.  Or maybe this is a wake-up call that I should look at changing the program and starting with a fresh perspective.  I have been meaning to do updates.  Or maybe start something totally new.  Is there something else I have been meaning to do?  Is there a new path?

Regarding the deal and partnership that I so treasured… I will keep in my thoughts that both my partner and I will be very happy with whatever the outcome or resolution may be and remain friends and still send each other business.  Perhaps letting go is good – even though it scares me and fills me with unanswered questions about the future.

This also made me realize – when things went – poof! Gone!  That we have a CHOICE to be here.  We have a choice to keep offering the same programs or start again from scratch or even change what we do every day. No one is forcing you to stay at your job, even though it may feel like that sometimes.   We always have a CHOICE to look for new solutions or not. 

It made me remember that in ANY industry you will meet villains, saints and people who do things you just don’t understand (out of fear, jealousy, negative belief systems or desperation), so accept that.  There will be people you help who may resent you for your help later.  I think dogs are the only animals that won’t bite you after you feed them.  People unfortunately can sometimes.  What’s with the dog theme here?

Letting Go Of My Maps
I don’t have everything planned to perfection as I typically do at this time of year.  I choose to not feel panicked about that.  Ok, I repeat, I choose not to feel panicked (I feel like Dorothy clicking her heels and deeply concentrating here – this is hard).   After all I think if there is one life lesson Stefanie Hartman is supposed to learn it’s that you can TRUST life more.  Life has a way of working out.  Life has its own map & timeline.   I hate not having full direction by now, not seeing what is to come.  I can adjust plans, but I typically need to have some direction.  I love maps!  So I’m easing up on that somewhat.  Yes I will identify a few goals, but if I don’t know where my next income is going to be made I will TRUST more that it will (back to the shoes clicking).

Letting Go & Taking a Stand for Me
I will not compare myself or my progress to others as that only ends badly.  I just realized that when I compare myself to others, I never compare to those ‘below’ me, just ‘above’ me (basically whoever has something I would also like to have)?   Really this is not a fair comparison without the two perspectives.   While there will be people smarter, more successful, “luckier”, prettier, taller, whatever, there will also be people whose life you would never trade for.  Many people have greater challenges and discomfort or pain.  I will remember the bigger picture and be grateful every day. 

There are very successful people who can feel like failures because they hold themselves to ridiculous standards or ‘fail’ their own self-imposed timelines.  I do not want to be one of them.

I will also retain my own successes in my mind and heart with personal pride and not let my achievements diminish as soon as they are accomplished for fear of being egotistical.  Being happy for myself is not a negative thing, especially when I am genuinely happy for those around me too.  I will no longer put my own happiness in second, third or fourth place.

I will continue to run my business in a way I am proud of, even if others are “getting ahead” faster through not so pleasant methods. 

I will be proud of myself and TRUST that my life has its own timeline and I cannot plan everything.

I will stretch time and spend 8 hours a month connecting with a business & personal relationships – out of the blue.  Telling them how much I care for them.

I will not hold onto what I think ‘should happen’ with a tight grip, even if I am sad or have fear – as I will trust that if it is not meant to work out (no matter what it is), gripping it will only give me a hand cramp and waste time and energy.   Letting things fall where they may, makes room for something better that I may never have even imagined.

It is possible that the plan I have is not as great as the plan the universe has.  I am betting on you universe – so now’s your chance. 

I will do more things in love of life and in spite of fear.

Humanity has gotten me down a bit this past year, so maybe I should add a project that will show the charitable and unexpected sides of people, or do something to help rescue distressed animals.  I will meditate on this.  Having a positive project may be good for me.

I will learn how to meditate.

I will continue to take the risk of opening myself up to the world (and who ever reads this, thank you), keep being transparent, VULNERABLE and real – and hope that I don’t need to be ‘perfect’ and a shark for others to see that while I have vulnerable moments I have many more moments of great strength, that in fact being vulnerable, not putting on a persona in public takes great courage and strength. 

I will try not to take to heart the 1 or 2 negative emails I get from people every so often.  I will instead put more weight on the hundreds of positive ones.

I will let myself be wrong occasionally and forgive myself.  I will forgive others as well.

Whenever I feel fear, I will remember its ‘made up’, not real, and I will trust more.

I will work on getting my body into a gym, and getting my mind/soul into some fun activities as well as some soul searching.

I will go and get some more chocolate caramels because I just missed lunch.

I will not be so hard on myself.

I will keep my sense of humor…it may be the last thing I take with me on earth.

Foreshadow: I‘m thinking my next year’s blog post may be about visiting the dentist from all these milk duds I am eating.  Ok I’m done with eating chocolate – free milk dud boxes for those who think they can top this!

Maybe if I keep saying MILK DUDS the company will sponsor my blog, milk duds, milk duds, and no calls yet…I will keep trying later.

Thanks for listening…..

Your friend, mentor (hopefully still after this crazy blog post) and person who may be YOUR biggest fan and cheerleader,

Stefanie Hartman

PS – Please post your proper email address as will will be contacting the winners!

Wow.  Holidays are fast approaching – so my question is – Is your ‘to do’ list growing now that the holidays are just around the corner?  Well then, give yourself an energy boost and read this article by Dr. Oz (and me) on managing stress at work.

Here’s my tip:

Studies have shown that people will actually accomplish a task in the time allotted to them.  For example if someone said you have 10 hours to finish this report, people would work during that time, unproductively, unhappily – but it would get done. However if that deadline was to get that report finished in 1 hour or even a really crazy low time like 30 minutes or – believe it or not, people would still get it finished. 

Have you witnessed this phenomenon in your life?

I was once at a hotel seminar and the leader gave us 5 minutes to go to up to our rooms, pack, and check out at the hotel front desk – and there were like 20 of us.  Results: We actually did it.  It stunned me.  It was like time stood still.

Often times we OVER-estimate how long stuff should take us to you.  My advice? Create your own mini deadlines with rewards at the end.  Say to yourself – I’m going to finish all my email correspondence in 20  minutes – then I can take an extra 30 minutes off at lunch or I can eat some chocolate or I will go to a movie tonight.  Anything that gets you motivated.  It is FUN and you will see results.

Here’s Dr. Oz’s advice:

While it would be a mistake for me to assume there’s only one way to work, I do think there are some traits and behaviors that can make time and energy management a whole lot easier. But here are three things you should consciously try to integrate into your workday if you haven’t already:
- Map your Day: Though you don’t have to stick to an exact schedule, you can get some stress relief if you can organize your tasks and not leave your day to total chance. Don’t work off the inbox…work off your plan for the day. (Only manage the inbox after you’ve done what you desire to do.)
- Break Often: Take a walk, have a bottle of water, clear your head. It’s all part of energy management. The few minutes you spend away from your desk will make you more efficient when you get back.
- Enlist Troops: We know that people are pretty stubborn when it comes to trying to accomplish goals on their own; they think it’s a sign of failure if they show weakness or an inability to do a job. But you’ll reduce stress (and save time) by asking for help when you need it.

What are your tips and advice?  Post them below for all of us to save time and create less stress in our lives and business.

All the best,

Stefanie

I have some gift vouchers for something amazing! 

Maybe it’d be right for you…

Several months back, I flew to New York and volunteered my time to be part of a small business expert community which truly serves small business owners and entrepreneurs whether starting out or already up and running.

There are literally hours and hours of candid, real world video advice from experts in every area.

Visit: www.homebusinessbrains.com/stefaniehartman to see just who I’m talking about. It’s not public yet, but for contributing, I can get you to-the-front-of-the-line today BEFORE it officially launches and you get a deal on a LIFETIME access.  You can see some sneak peeks with over 100 videos of small business experts…including me….to see at what’s it all about.

You can check-out my videos at this first of its kind Multi-Media Educational Hub for Small Business Entrepreneurs where you’ll find never before seen videos of go-to experts, such as Michael Gerber, Declan Dunn, Jen Groover and on and on and on…

What’s even nicer of them, they offered me gift vouchers to give away. I sincerely recommend you take full advantage of this – we’re talking a year of access.

GIFT VOUCHERS:  I have 5 gift vouchers to give away to some lucky people, who will receive access to the Brainstorm Level of Home Business Brains for a whole year at NO CHARGE! 

TO WIN A VOUCHER  Submit a comment and tell me what’s your biggest business challenge, what you’d love to learn from me in the future or what I can give you more of and submit your name. We put all names in a hat and will randomly select 5 winners next week.  Value $147.

== > And the first person to post automatically gets one! Cause you’re cool!

Secondly:   How would you like to experience a 10-day Business Makeover by 24 First-class Experts and Luminaries… and Expect a Revenue Take-off in Your Business Within 90 Days of Implementing Their Personal Development and Business Growth Advice, Tips, Insights, Tactics and Strategies. 

This is a new twist on a great concept,  The line up and topics are stellar and this is the time to get unstuck and pointed in the right direction… with confidence, precision, and finally some peace of mind – Ask the experts your questions personally.

I highly recommend this for you, for your business and for those dependent on you, I hope you’ll act on this transformational opportunity…

Click the link below to get the full details and register:
www.stefaniehartman.com/recommendation/gasppo

And Third: Meet in Vegas this Halloween! One of my favorite people on the planet – Rick Frishman is gearing up for the Author 101 Event in Las Vegas. 

This is the biggest Author 101 that I have seen- they are expecting 450 people – so register as its CHEAP, and network your butt off.  Remember I’ll introduce you around as I will be there speaking at the event.

Are you curious about what publishers like Harper Collins, Morgan James, Adams Media, Wiley, Random House, and Simon & Schuster are looking for? What is the best way to get your manuscript read when you’re an unpublished author? Want to know the biggest mistakes to avoid when writing book proposals? You’ll be engaged as these top pros share their expertise, reveal the inner workings of the publishing industry, and discuss various approaches to common marketing and publishing challenges. 

Join me in Vegas I’ll see you there:
www.stefaniehartman.com/recommendation/author101

Good Luck

Stefanie

In the U.S. in July, employers cut 250,000 jobs and retailers saw a decline in sales for the eleventh straight month.    Wall Street is withering in the economic drought, and optimism for recovery anytime soon is low.  If you’re thinking about starting a small business right now, you might be thinking twice.  If you’ve already started your business, you might be listening to all the bleak predictions on the business news and wondering if you’re doomed before you even get started.

Does your business stand a chance?    Continue Reading

I just read a terrific post from David Riklan of Self-Growth on the effectiveness of email advertising.  He addresses the question:  “Does email newsletter advertising really work?” His answer  is a firm, “That depends!”  Some products — health products, financial services, and help for relationships and self-improvement — tend to fare better than others with online marketing. Continue Reading

I can hardly believe it’s FINALLY here! I have been sitting on this thing for WAY too long – and the time has come for me to share it with you! (And as a member of my online community, you’re getting exclusive access 10 days BEFORE everyone else does!)

Let me tell you – if you’re an entrepreneur or small business owner, these are the words you’ve been WAITING to hear (I know because this whole thing was created out of my own longing as an entrepreneur to just get some of the help I needed!)

I am so excited to finally be able to tell you about a new service that is going to let you check off everything on your list for your business – and check it off fast (and cheaply too!).

Now, you know me – I love marketing strategy and techniques and teaching my students the behind-the-scenes secrets of how the super successful become well-known, generate massive leads, and well…make a ton of money doing it.

And of course I put many of these techniques into practice in my own business – but even I can never seem to do ALL the ones I want to in a year – I just don’t have the time or the energy. And it’s not always easy to find the right kind of help – even if you can afford to hire out!

The real truth is (and trust me, most marketers won’t tell you this) – you’ll probably never have all ofthe hours and dollars that you’ll need to learn and implement all the top marketing strategies for your business – it’s just too much!

And when you’re continually balancing your business needs, wearing many hats, and trying to enjoy a life at the same time, you’ve gotta ask yourself…

WHO CAN REALLY…IN REALITY…STUDY FOR 10 – 12 HOURS EVERY SINGLE DAY TO JUST KEEP UP WITH THE LATEST TRAFFIC & LIST BUILDING STRATEGIES!

And really…wait for it…here’s the kicker…

WHY THE HECK SHOULD YOU HAVE TOO??????? Continue Reading

Throughout my life I have taken classes on many different subjects.  While learning sports like golf, ballet, skating, and dancing, I learned that physical and mental balance were equally important.  I even took several medieval sword training classes at one time!

All of these experiences reinforced what I already believed: The combination of both physical control and mental FOCUS were the key to mastering all of these activities.

Taking the classes addressed what is needed to learn and develop the skills needed.  They honed my concentration and showed me the basics.  Any one who has golfed knows that when you get that hole in one it’s a level satisfaction unlike any other…until you reach another goal you aspired to that is.

Are You in Need of a Spring Tune Up?

The majority of high achievers will tell you that the key to their success has been their ability to balance the many aspects of their lives.  They also acknowledge that though they may not have gone to school for that specific field, they found books, mentors and peers to gather information which led to their success.  Information is power.

As one, I believe this is true of all aspects of your life.  Being able to align different facets of your life can actually be the way to reaching your goals.

An important concept successful and inspired self-starter understand is that money is merely

• an exchange or reward
• for your time or your value.

If you’re reading this and thinking:

• Life feels hard
• You don’t have enough time in the day
• You feel burned out or tired all the time
• You’re not making enough money for the hours you’re working

Then as you may have already realized, your life is out of balance.  I believe that realizing that being paid for your VALUE as opposed to your time is one of the most critical hurdles to over come.

Or you may be thinking you are on the verge of achieving total equilibrium but just need a little help, some tips or further information to get you over the last few obstacles.

What if you could adjust those issues that are troubling you or not going the way you’d like them to?  What if I told you there was a way to turn things around?

To live a more inspired life means experiencing satisfaction in every category of your life.  You can improve on your business, personal interests and relationships step by step.  A refresher course, new ideas and inspiration, or some guidance could be the direct route to excelling in business and achieving balance through your life.

Sometimes all it takes is recognizing that you need a little help, some mentorship or training.  If that sounds like you then I hope you check out the link below!

The Millionaires in Training^TM

If your answer to that is not a big fat YES, than you’ve got some work to do!

Almost any business person or marketer’s knee jerk reaction when you mention the word ‘competitor’ is an inner cringe.  It’s just the way most of us were raised to think…you’ve got to get ahead or you’ll fall behind, work harder than that other guy, win or lose – you’re either at the head of the game or you may as well not be playing!

But business has changed.

The economic upheaval that is all around is proving on a daily basis how much the old patterns and ways of doing things are falling away – and NOW is the time to be a part of the New Evolution of Business – which means updating your marketing strategy to work WITH your competitors for greater exposure and profit than ever before.

What do I mean by that?

You’ve probably heard the term ‘Joint Ventures’.  Did you know that Joint Ventures are all around you?

When you go into Walmart and find a McDonald’s inside, that’s a Joint Venture.  When you go into Starbucks and use T-Mobile or Rogers WiFi, that’s a Joint Venture.  When you watch Major League Baseball on NBC, it’s a Joint Venture.

There are countless examples of how corporations are using this powerful marketing strategy to increase their profits and recognition in leaps and bounds.  If corporations are the epitome of old-style, crush the competition business ways and they are using this technique, you know there’s something to it!

The truth is, entrepreneurs and small business’ are NOT taking advantage!

I’ve seen so much exciting evidence that the entrepreneurs of today have a ton of heart – you have an amazing product or service that you just want to share with the world – you want to make money, but you want to serve people too.

You’ve gotten that part of Abundance mentality down…but when it comes to actually partnering with the competition, I still see that people either don’t know enough about the ‘how’ to put it into action, or they’re afraid that it will do more harm than help (I mean, why am I going to promote someone that I’m up against?). Continue Reading

As spring comes into full swing I am mindful that the first business quarter has come to an end and the next is beginning.    It’s a great time to take stock of where you are, and maybe even readjust your strategy or note what is needed to add or change to achieve the goals you have set for the coming months.

The ability to readjust your approach or tactics as you go can mean the difference between successful marketing and sales fizzling.

So the question is:

• Have you taken stock of where you are?
• Have you planned out how to schedule attacking your marketing plan?

Just like using a map or GPS system, by noting these markers you can be steps ahead of the competition just by taking stock of where you are.

Using a sales and marketing calendar is something that I recommend when consulting my clients and it is one of the strategies that I teach in my The Millionaires in Training^TM Program.  A sales and marketing calendar gives you a hands-on ability to ability to allocate time and energy for items critical to your businesses marketing plan.

If you check in with your marketing plans each quarter you will find it a useful way to monitor your progress. I will have an indication if I need to re-adjust something or if I am close to my strategic destination I may be happy to leave things as they are.

I recommend doing this “checking in” as it can allow you to acknowledge not only those things you need to adjust but your successes as well.

Your marketing and sales calendar can give you a keen awareness of which months your promotions are booked, giving you much needed lead in time to take care of the details which can make the difference between a successful outcome or a possible setback.

To build your own sales calendar I recommend taking the following steps:

• List out all your products and programs. Input them into the appropriate date.
• Block out time to spend developing your business.
• Add a sales goal each month.

As one of aspects that I teach in my The Millionaires in Training^TM Program, a sales and marketing calendar can greatly improve your success.  The Millionaires in Training^TM Program is designed to empower you even if marketing seems as clear as a foreign language to you. You will receive clear direction, answers to your unique questions and be placed in an environment where you are supported by an intimate group of like-minded individuals, specialized coaches, and my marketing experts and instructors.

A sales and marketing calendar is just one of the many resources successful businesses and entrepreneurs use to increase sales, bring in new business and maximize their growth potential.

What's Stopping You?

When I was working my way through university in the summers, I had a job at a totally rustic resort that was only accessible by sea plane – it was that remote!  This place catered to high powered American executives that paid quite a lot to stay in the lodge, fish, and just get away from it all.

There was no TV, no radio – it was a really peaceful place!

I was the only waitress working there, and I actually got to spend a lot of time sitting on the dock just chatting with these guys.  They were CEOs and top executives of some big companies – these guys owned tons of stock and they were very wealthy.

I was a bit intimidated by them because of that at first, but the experiences that I had as I spent time with these people through my summer job showed me that all these guys that were super super successful were really just like me – regular human beings (I know – I was surprised too!

They showed me that there was no difference between me and them.  Even though I was ‘just a waitress’, they never treated me any differently or showed me any less respect, and I learned a lot just from chatting with them!

I mention this because it really served me later on when I got into the business I am in now and started working with these big name gurus – the people on the talk shows, bestselling authors, etc.

I know that a lot of my students kind of feel they are somehow separated from that – that they’re very different or somehow not on that level, which is just so completely not the reality of it!

Successful people feel exactly the same way we do. When they do succeed, they feel happy about it, and failure feels just as bad to them as it does to us!

BUT, the main difference that I have noticed in super successful people is that Continue Reading